Everything smells way to good!

Still succeeding at this diet that started last week, which has resulted in my weight going from 59 - 55 ish, which is the most i've lost for a long time (sad but true) and this is definitely the most control i've been in since my ED started (haven't purged in two weeks woot). The only bad thing is the SMELLS. for instance, tonight i was indirectly banned from cooking dinner, i think the 'rents suspect after i've demanded to cook the whole week. So i had to sabotage because the menu was PORK and BEEF meat balls and i insisted on no olive oil and using ultra light marg but still there was probly about... eight tablespoons used!! anyway when my dad was out of the room i drained them as much as possible and drained the onion that was coated in fat. But yeah i made salad and filled my plate with that and two of the balls but they smelt soooo good. Thats the only thing i hate. the feeling of missing out on all this amazing food, and for some reason when you're bingeing or eating normally, food all starts to taste the same but when you're starving everything smells...intoxicating. Obviously i'm just raving, mainly because i can still smell meatballs and the glass of diet green tea mineral water is just not that appetizing.

Anyway i'm working tomorrow 9-3 so back into the schedule, the a party 5-10. have to decide whether i want dinner (bombay potatoes - 200) at like 4.30 or skip. I'm working the same sunday so probly will have dinner.

I've barely started studying for my trials second day back, and with two days till school i don't exactly have time so stuff it. As soon as school restarts we'll go back to the usual, frightful dinner routine (a mix of taco's, lasagne and oily meat/vegges - impossible to avoid and eventually a lead into full on all day non stop bingeing! - i should move back with my mother...).

Anyway of too watch black books which is possibly the best show since diet coke was invented.
xx Claude